Cookies Anyone?
by AznAnimeGrl2649
Summary: [AU] .:SasuSaku, NaruHina, NejiTen, InoShika:. A Home Economics project goes wrong when Naruto and the others have to bake cookies. Can Kurenai trust them all to bake cookies or will they burn down Konoha High?


**A/N:** Hope you enjoy my story!

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**Started:** Wednesday, July 13, 2005

**Finished:** Thursday, July 14, 2005

**Fiction:** One-Shot

**Rated:** PG-13

**Disclaimer:** The characters and names of Naruto are own by Kishimoto Masashi-Sensei. The plot belongs to me.

**Anime:** Naruto

**Pairings:** VERY SLIGHT SasuSaku, NaruHina, NejiTen, And MEGA SLIGHT InoShika and SakuLee

**Summary:** A Home Economic project turns in a disaster when Naruto and the others have make cookies. Can Kurenai-sensei trust them all to bake cookies? Will they all burn down Konohagakure High? Will Kiba **ever** shut up? So . . .

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"Cookies Anyone?"

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"WHAT THE **HECK** HAPPENED IN HERE?"

Not a word came from the mouths of the exhausted Juniors and Seniors. It was dead silent. Outside, the weather is warm and the windows are all opened to let the smoke escape from the burning ovens. Some students in the room had black smudges on their face and flour in their hair. Others were scratching themselves like they have the chickenpox and some were just sweating from the heat in the Home Economics room. The sleeves on everyone are all rolled up to their elbows and their navy jackets were piled up on the tables and counters of the kitchen stations.

"WELL?"

"Kurenai-sensei, it was all-"

"No it wasn't, you wide fore-"

"How trouble-"

"Just like cock-"

"What-"

"Potato-"

"Ramen would be easier-"

"K-k-kurenai- i-"

"BUGS WERE EVERY-"

"It wasn't the ants-"

"I can example about the kitchen-"

"It's our youthful-"

"SHUT UP! ONE AT A TIME!"

" . . .Ino's fault!"

" -head girl!"

" -some."

" -roaches."

" -ever."

" -chips."

" . . .to cook!"

" -s-s-sensei."

"-WHERE!"

" -fault."

" -knives."

" -ness."

"SHUT THE **HELL** UP RIGHT **_NOW_**!" They all did as they were told.

"NOW, **_ONE_** AT A TIME. Sakura, let's start with you." The cherry blossom broke her gaze with her rival beside her and turned to the Home Economics teacher.

"As I was saying before: Kurenai-sensei, it was all Ino's fault."

"NO IT WASN'T!"

"Ino, please don't interrupt and let her speak," said the angry-piss-off teacher. The cheerleader grumbled something under breath and let her ex-best friend continue. "So, Sakura please tell me, in your own words what happened."

"Well, Kurenai-sensei, it went like this . . . "

* * *

"We all went to our stations to make the cookies. Sasuke-kun and I were working quietly on our cookie project when Ino-Pig interrupted us."

_**-No, I didn't!-**_

_**-Ino, what did I just say?-**_

_**-Sorry, Kurenai-sensei-**_

"As I was saying, she interrupted us because she was jealous that I got to work with Sasuke-kun and she had to work with Shikamaru."

_"Hi, Sasuke-kun."_

_"What do you want, Ino-Pig!"_

_"Can't I come over and say 'Hi?' "_

_"I guess."_

"So, _Sasuke-kun, would you like to go out with me?"_

_"I thought you were just going to say 'hi.' "_

_"Shouldn't you be mixing the batter together or something, you nerd?"_

_"I'm not a nerd!"_

_"Then why do you get straight A's and go around wearing that dorky uniform like a nerd!"_

_"It's the dress code!"_

_"So?"_

_"Did you just come over just to say 'hi' and insult me on how I wear my uniform?"_

_"No."_

_"Then can I help you with something?"_

_"Let me borrow that bowl of sugar, forehead girl."_

_"Don't call me that! Ino-Pig!"_

_"I can call you whatever I like, you whore, acting like you're-!"_

_"SHUT UP! You can call me whatever you like with the bitches you call your friends, but don't start with me!"_

_"Like **you** have friends, bitch!"_

_"At least I'm not a high and mighty bitch that goes around talking about shit and spread rumors about other people!"_

_"I don't spread rumors!"_

_"Who else would start a rumor about me being a-"_

_"IT WASN'T ME OK!"_

_"Yeah, tell it to that to the Principal's face!"_

_"You're such a teacher's pet, no wonder people would talk shit about you!"_

_"I am not!"_

_"Yeah? Why do you always get student of the month EVERY month? I swear, you're such a suck up!"_

_"Shut up!"_

_"How troublesome. What are you doing over here? The cookies are not going to bake themselves"_

_"You were suppose to help bake them, you lazy ass. Go get cooking!"_

_"I need to the brown sugar."_

_"Ask that bitch. She wouldn't hand it over."_

_"Maybe she would if you had ask nicely." _

_"Sasuke-kun, I was-"_

_"Here's your brown sugar. Go away."_

_"Come on, Nara, let's go bake the damn cookies."_

_"Troublesome woman."_

_"What did you say?"_

_"Nothing."_

_"T-t-thank y-y-you Sasuke-kun."_

_"Hn."_

XOXOX

_"WHAT THE HELL!"_

_"Do you have to be so loud, dobe?"_

_"Don't call me that, Sasuke-teme!"_

_"Hn."_

_"What the **hell **does 'tsp.' mean?"_

_"I-i-t m-m-means t-t-teaspoon, N-n-naruto-kun."_

_"Oh, thanks Hinata."_

_"We're suppose to add this stuff right?"_

_"N-n-no, that's b-b-baking powder."_

_"This?"_

_"N-n-no, that's cream of tartar."_

_"Argh! They all look the SAME!"_

_"H-here."_

_"What's **hell** is this stuff?"_

_"I-I-it's the b-baking -s-soda."_

_"Oh, ok. Let's put it in."_

_"O-o-ok."_

XOXOX

_"Che. Look at them."_

_"What, Neji?"_

_"That idiot would be lost if Hinata-sama wasn't there."_

_"Would it kill you to be nice to him for one hour?"_

_"Hn. Why did we take this class anyway?"_

_"I thought it might be fun."_

_"You cooking fun?"_

_"Whatever. Just come here and help me cut up this stupid batter."_

_"It can't be that hard."_

_"Well, it is. I tried every damn knife in the draws."_

_"Maybe you just need to sharpen them."_

_"I did!"_

_"Give it to me."_

_"Cheap ass knives. I bet they wouldn't even cut paper, wet!"_

_"Calm down."_

_"Whatever you say, Neji-kun."_

_"Hn."_

XOXOX

_"I can't find the sugar! Akamaru, did you eat it all?"_

_"The sugar is behind you."_

_"WHERE?"_

_"Next to the window."_

_"Oh."_

_"Ahhhh! Ants are crawling all over the bag! Akamaru, crush them!"_

_"Do even think about it."_

_"WHY NOT?"_

_"They are living beings too."_

_"WHO CARES! THEY ARE GOING TO-"_

_"I care."_

_"COME ON, man! Shino, dude! THEY'RE ANTS. THERE ARE A MILLION OF THEM AND THEY'RE ALL OVER THE DAMN BAG OF SUGAR! WE NEED THAT SUGAR TO MAKE COOKIES!"_

_"Just ask other people."_

_"Stupid Bugs!"_

_"They're insects."_

_"WHATEVER!"_

XOXOX

_"Yosh! LET"S GET BAKING! THE POWER OF YOUTH WILL MAKE THE COOKIES AS SWEET AS SAKURA-SAN'S SWEET ANGELIC VOICE!"_

_" -munch munch, crunch."_

_"Chouji, can you please hand me the bowl?"_

_"Here. -crunch."_

_"Cookies, cookies. We are going to bake cookies. What is your favorite cookie, Chouji?"_

_"Chips."_

_"What? They make chip cookies?"_

_"Chips."_

_"Really?"_

_"Chips."_

_"Whoa. That's weird. I never tried one before. HEY! I got an idea. Let's make them right now!"_

_"Chip cookies?"_

_"Yeah! With the power of youth by our side, we can do anything!"_

_"Okay."_

_"Yosh! Let's get baking!"_

XOXOX

_"How do you turn on this damn thing?"_

_"It's called a knob."_

_"Then why don't you do it, you lazy bum!"_

_"How troublesome. Are you so blinded that you can't see the freaking knob? It's that black thing right there."_

_"I'm not blind!"_

_"Then why are you asking me about some dumb knob problem?"_

_"I didn't see it, okay!"_

_"Shouldn't women know about these things?"_

_"Are you being sexist?"_

_"No, I was just saying."_

_"I heard what you just said! You're saying that girls should know how to use a kitchen because they are the ones that usually do the cooking! That's being sexist!"_

_"No, it's not."_

_"Yes, it is!"_

_"If I was being sexist, then I would say that women are weak and men can do anything."_

_"Well, you said-"_

_"I just said that maybe women might know something about the oven because I was assuming that you would have spent some time with your mother in the kitchen."_

_"Well, I didn't okay!"_

_"I only assumed."_

_"Well, you assumed wrong! What do you know about me anyway! For all I know, you all probably think I'm just some brainless cheerleader, but I'm not! I get good grades too! You know nothing about me, so don't assume! Never make assumptions if you don't even know me!"_

_"Geez, how troublesome."_

_"Just shut up and turn on the damn oven."_

_"Women."_

_"Sexist!"_

_"I'm not sexist."_

_"Yeah, right."_

_"You know nothing of me, either, so eat your own words."_

_"Stop trying to be a smart-ass and do what I told you to!"_

_"Hmph."_

XOXOX

_"N-n-Naruto-kun, I-I-I y-y-you s-s-should s-stop p-pouring in the b-baking p-powder."_

_"I just want to add enough."_

_"O-okay."_

_"Let's put this in the oven!"_

XOXOX

_"Sasuke-kun, can you please hand me the eggs?"_

_"Here."_

_"Thanks."_

_"Let's see, 'mix them up and-"_

_"Here's the spoon."_

_"Oh, thank you."_

_"Hn."_

XOXOX

_"AHH!"_

_"I told you not to touch the bag of sugar. Now they are angry."_

_"GET THEM OFF, GET THEM OFF, GET THEM OFF!"_

_"Bark."_

XOXOX

_"-munch munch."_

_"THE OVEN IS SMOKING! CHOUJI, HAND ME THE OVEN MITTS! HURRY!"_

_" Crunch, crunch."_

_"AHH! THE CHIP COOKIES ARE BURNING!"_

XOXOX

_"N-n-naurto-kun, t-t-the c-c-cookies."_

_"What is Hinata?"_

_"T-t-they're-"_

_"What?"_

_"L-l-look."_

_"WHAT THE **FUCK**!"_

_"N-no, y-y-you n-n-need t-to p-put on the oven-"_

_"AHH, Mother-"_

_"O-Oh."_

_"SHIT! HOT HOT HOT!"_

_"H-h-here."_

_"No, Hinata! The cookies are-"_

_"Ahhh!"_

_"Naruto!"_

_"You idiot, look what you did."_

_"My hair! There's batter is all over my hair!"_

_"What the-"_

_"Oops."_

_"You forehead girl!"_

_"AHH!"_

_"You shouldn't throw that around."_

_"What, you sexist! Just because I'm a girl doesn't mean I can't be messy and throw flour around!"_

_"How troublesome."_

_"Come out from behind Sasuke, you freaking nerd!"_

_"It was an accident!"_

_"Tell that to my new tank top I just got!"_

_"Sorry, Sakura-ch- Hey! Who threw that?"_

_"N-n-naruto-kun, t-t-there is-"_

_"HELL, NOW I'M COVERED WITH FLOUR!"_

_"It's sugar dobe."_

_"WHO-Arrghhh! I'M SO ITCHY! WHAT THE HELL!"_

_"A-a-ants."_

_"Hinata, GET THEM OFF OF ME!"_

_"N-n-Naruto, the k-k-knives behind y-y-you!"_

_"Neji-kun, get him away from here-"_

_"AHH! THEY'RE ALL OVER ME!"_

_"You idiot. Don't go near here."_

_"SHUT UP, YOU ASS-"_

_"Don't call Neji-kun an asshole!"_

_"WHATEVER, BON-BONS!_

_"It's Ten-Ten!"_

_"SHIT! THEY ARE ALL OVER ME!"_

_"You shouldn't move around much. You're scaring the ants."_

_"You bug-o-holic! Tell them to get off of me!"_

_"No."_

_"ARGHH!"_

XOXOX

_"Ahhh!"_

_"Stop it, woman."_

_"SHUT UP, YOU LAZY BU- AHH!"_

_"Just because I'm lazy doesn't mean I wouldn't throw the flour at you."_

_"Argh! Why you-"_

_"The CHIP COOKIES!"_

_"-MUNCH, MUNCH."_

_"THE BUGS!"_

_"MY SUGAR!"_

_"THE ANTS!"_

_"MY HAIR!"_

_"THE KNIVES!"_

_"THE IDIOT."_

_"N-naruto-kun."_

_"DOBE."_

_"YOU SEXIST!"_

_"You troublesome woman."_

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"And that's how it went," finished Sakura.

"Is this true everyone?" Kurenai inquired. Nods and grumbled came from the group of Juniors and Seniors. The Home Economics teacher was sure that Sakura would tell the truth. That girl had a good head on her shoulders and she would not tell lies about anyone.

"Half of that wasn't true, Kurenai-sensei! Don't listen to that nerd!" Ino yelled. Her cerulean orbs flashed with anger while she glared at the pink haired girl.

"What I said had not lies in it!" argued Sakura. "If it did, then all of them would have said something otherwise. Seeing how they are not, I can safely say that I did tell the truth."

"NO! Most of the things you said about me wasn't true at all!" Ino screamed.

"Yeah, all of that was true," a voice said. The Uchiha stood there with his arms crossed. Most of his dark hair was white from the 'Flour War' Ino and Sakura had. Unfortunately, Sakura used him as a shield being the smart girl she is. And being the jock he is, Sasuke helped the rosette girl dodge the clumps of flour that were aimed at her. His cuffs were rolled up to his sleeves and his shirt was halfway unbuttoned thanks to the heat in room.

"B-but-"

"I agree," Naruto said, still scratching his self to get all of the ants off him. The blond had help from the girl beside him. Hinata was carefully picking the little critters that were crawling on Naruto's back. One by one, she lifted them off his clothing and placed them in a container Shino had in his hands. Kiba was also trying to get the ants out of his pants. Akamaru was sent to the nurse's office along with Chouji because the smoke was too much for his sensitive nose.

"Yes, it was true," replied the Nara. He was covered with flour from head to toe. The only thing on him that wasn't covered with flour was his silver earrings. He sat on the kitchen counter glaring at the teacher. It was her fault he was covered in all of that mess. She just **_had_** to pair him up with that stuck-up cheerleader. He would rather take a 'F,' despite the high IQ he has.

"Haruno's telling the truth," said the male Senior with eyes closed. Neji's long hair was draped over his shoulders and his crossed arms. The white shirt he is wearing was also unbuttoned and untucked. Standing next to him was Ten-Ten. The Senior girl was helping Sakura clean up the batter that got in her hair. It was greasy and slid off the short pink locks as Ten-Ten brushed some napkins on the girl's head.

"Ditto," exclaimed the brunette. "Sakura is telling the truth."

"YOSH! Sakura is pure as an angel and wouldn't lie!" Lee yelled in his good guy pose.

"Very well, I'll take everyone's word for it that Sakura's story was the truth of what went on when I was gone. But that doesn't excuse you from cleaning up this entire room!" scolded Kurenai. "So get cleaning! The brooms and mops are in the closet next to the refrigerator. When I come back, I expect this room to be just when I left it this morning! Got that!"

"Yes, Kurenai-sensei," They all chorused.

"Good because all of you will have detention this afternoon and for the rest of the week!"

"WHAT!" exclaimed everyone except for the Hyuugas in the room, Sasuke, Shino, and the Nara genius.

"But I have cheerleading practice!" Ino yelled. Her blond was almost all white from all the amount of flour on her head. Both of her hands were on her hips as she scowled at her teacher.

"Well, maybe you should have thought of that before throwing all that flour around the room," Kurenai said simply. "What are all of you standing here for? Do you **_want_** me to add more hours to your detention!"

The group of boys and girls quickly went over to their stations and started to clean up the mess. Mops and cloths were soon wiping the floors and counters that were all sticky and greasy from the ingredients needed to make cookies. Cookies, such delectable and soft morsels that would tempt anyone regardless of the person's age. It is like a piece of heaven in your mouth when you take the first bite. Too bad the delicious soft and chewy treat is not going to be enjoyed by the students present in the Home Economic room.

Rock Lee sighed at the mess in his station. His partner was gone and he had to do all the cleaning by himself. He placed the bowl used to mix batter in the sink and wiped the counters. Lee continued to clean as he look around him. Ino the cheerleader was no where to be seen and so is Shikamaru. They were probably in the bathroom getting rid of the flour that was on them. Sakura was helping Sasuke clean while Naruto, Hinata, Kiba and Shino were still at the table, all determined to pick up all of the ants and place them in the can. Ten-Ten and Neji were grabbing all of the various knives that were scattered all over their kitchen station. Who knew a kitchen needed all of those metal blades.

Wiping sweat from his forehead, Lee suddenly heard a ding. It came from the oven. Putting on the oven mitts, he opened the door and pulled out the hot tray and placed them on the counter. They were all burnt to a crisp. The whole room was instantly filled with the smell of burnt potato chips and cookie batter. All of the heads in the room turned to Lee's direction. Nervously, he took off the red cotton cushions on his hands and inched toward the metal tray.

Holding up what seemed to resemble a cluster of charcoal, Rock Lee gulped at the looks they were all giving him, "Um . . . cookies, anyone?"

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**A/N:** How did you like it? I'll give you a cookie if you'll excuse my grammar and spelling mistakes. Haha, just kidding. You wouldn't want my cookies. I thought the concept of baking was a tough thing to do. Heh. I love making cookies, but every time I bake them, something would be wrong about them. I guess that's what inspired me to write this story. Maybe that's why we leave the baking to moms and grandmas. LoL. Please give me any thoughts you might have about my writing. I don't mind constructive criticism just as long it is in an intelligent manner.

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Thank you for reading!


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